I know it all too well.

Disappointment, unfortunately, is not a feeling I’m unfamiliar with.  I wouldn’t say my life overall has been a disappointment, because it hasn’t, but there have been aspects of it that have disappointed me, either because of my own doing or someone else’s.  One big disappointment I have is that I didn’t force myself to be more sociable when I was younger, because I missed out on having friends until I got to high school and met girls who were similarly disposed.  I didn’t get invited to birthday parties, I didn’t sleep over at anyone’s house, there weren’t any play dates.  I was alone, basically.  I got used to it and learned to make my own fun, but my sister, who is eons more outgoing than I am, had (and continues to have) the kind of social life I wanted, which stung.  I also wish I’d focused less on my grades in college and more on building up my resume.  With my class load, not to mention the classes I was taking in general, I couldn’t have balanced a job with getting decent grades, so I forwent work so I could get A’s and B’s.  That led to me graduating with absolutely nothing in the way of work experience, and no matter how often job notices say they want entry-level candidates, I’m proof that they don’t get hired.  I’ve struggled with finding full-time employment ever since, and I graduated in 2005.

Again, I’m not trying to make it sound like my life has been one dismal failure after the other — it hasn’t been.  Just that there are things if I could go back and change, I would.



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