Pandora’s Box.

Hope is a funny thing.  I have it, but then I don’t.  Regular readers of this blog will know of my current struggles to find gainful employment and to keep on track with my weight loss plan, and there are days when getting up in the morning, having to face both those uphill battles, just seems like more of a chore than anything else.  Does anyone else have those days?  You know, where you’d just like to throw the covers over your head and call the whole day a wash?  I’m like that most days.  I wish I wasn’t because it’s incredibly defeatist, but I’ve struggled with undiagnosed depression since I was a teenager, I’m sure of it.

Anyway, back to hope…I have hope that one day my life will work out like I want it to, and I have hope that one day I won’t face the struggles that I do, but it’s hard to keep hope alive, it’s hard to stay positive in the face of overwhelming negativity.  My family has enough to worry about without worrying about me too, so I try to keep that in the back of my mind, to just handle things myself if I can, so that’s another thing I’m hopeful about — I’m hopeful that one day, everything plaguing my family will just go away.  Or if that’s not possible, at least be greatly lessened.  What are you hopeful for?  What do you want to see happen in your life that either hasn’t happened before or happened once that you want to happen again?


  1. granonine · May 4, 2016

    I hope that you’ll consider seeing a therapist who can help you pick through your probable depression. There is help out there.


    • Beth · May 4, 2016

      If I could afford something like that, I’d absolutely do it. Unfortunately, with no job and no money, I also have no insurance, which means no seeing any doctor of any kind, be it a therapist, a dentist, a GP, etc. Once I find work though, I want to do that because it sucks feeling like it’s a drain getting up every morning.

      Liked by 1 person

      • granonine · May 4, 2016

        I’m so sorry. Sounds like you’re in a tough place in your life right now. Know that I will pray for you.


  2. Pingback: Eating Like A Refugee | The Ration Challenge | Ramisa the Authoress

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