I’d never make a very good comedian.

Comedy is a weird thing for me — the things other people find funny, I rarely do.  For example, I don’t like and have never understood the appeal of, toilet humor.  You know, fart jokes, poop jokes, dick jokes, sex jokes….I just don’t get it.  It’s not that I don’t understand the joke, it’s that I don’t get why the joke is funny.  I think Seth MacFarlane is an incredibly talented man (on top of being incredibly sexy, but that’s a different blog post), and I wish I had 1/10 the artistic acumen that he does, but I’ve tried to watch Family Guy, and it just….I feel like something in my brain doesn’t work, because I don’t laugh at the parts everyone else laughs at.  Same with American Pie — someone please explain why sticking your dick in a pie is funny.  Fruit pies are often incredibly hot, especially in the middle, so why would you put a very sensitive part of your anatomy into it?  If it’ll burn the  hell out of your tongue or roof of your mouth, what do you think it’ll do to your pecker?  Why is someone farting funny?  If I’m out in public and someone near me breaks wind, the first thing I feel is embarrassment for that person, and the second thing is I wonder if they have some kind of GI ailment that gives them the flatulence in the first place.  I don’t start laughing at them….they’re probably humiliated enough as it is.

What am I missing?



  1. granonine · August 9, 2016

    Bravo! I’m with you! When I taught junior high (11-13 year-olds) I always opened the first day of class by telling them there would be no bathroom humor, no potty-mouth, tolerated in my classroom. Some of them had a hard time stifling their laughter. You’d think grown-ups would grow out of that stuff, wouldn’t you?

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Dangerspouse · August 9, 2016

    I’m curious to hear an example of a joke you do find funny. I love jokes of all stripes myself, and am always interested in what tickles the funny bone of others.

    Would this pass muster with you? It’s not “toilet humor” by any means, although a bit macabre:

    A guy dies, and his wife goes to the funeral home to make arrangements. “I’d like to have him buried in a blue suit please” she tells the funeral director. “What’s wrong with the black suit he came in with?” he asks her. “It’s a personal reason” she says. “If you can swing it I’d be very grateful, and pay whatever it takes.” He assures her that he’ll do his best, but the funeral is the next morning and he can’t promise anything.

    The next morning she shows up at the funeral, walks down the aisle to the coffin, and looks in. To her great relief she sees her husband decked out in a gorgeous blue suit.

    After the ceremony she thanks the funeral director and asks what she owes him.

    “Actually you don’t owe me anything” he says. “As luck would have it, right after you left another woman came in to make arrangements for her husband who’d just passed away. He was brought in wearing a blue suit, so I asked her if she would mind if he were buried in a black suit instead. She had no objections, so I switched their heads.”

    (By the way, PLEASE do not click on my blog. I filled it with patently offensive humor for the Joke Prompt.)

    Liked by 1 person

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