Have you ever known anyone that just doesn’t know when to shut the hell up? The kind of person who prattles on and on at the mouth, ad infinitum, until you’re left fantasizing about how far down their throat you can shove your fist? I know someone like that. It’s infuriating to be around them sometimes, much as I love them, if only because once they get going on a topic, they GET GOING on it. Like a train barreling down the tracks. This friend I speak of is so adept at this skill, they once turned a conversation about the 2016 Presidential election into a discussion on whether smoked mozzarella was superior to smoked provolone or not, and they did this without so much as taking a breath or letting anyone else guide the conversation in that direction. If it wasn’t so awe-inspiring, I’d have punched them in the arm for it.